Merry Christmas

Well, it is a little late, but since no one reads this anyway it won't matter.

When you are trying to lose weight, the holidays are hard! I can't even tell you how hard it is to deny temptations, when they are bombarding you all day, every minute, every single second of the day! I can say the more you say NO, the more empowered you get. But then Fudge comes along and totally melts your resolve!

I love fudge. It is smooth, creamy, chocolaty and full of delicious savory flavors that satisfy my very happy taste buds!! I feel it from my head to my toes. A good creamy dark chocolate pecan fudge can make my toes curl. I am drooling as I type this and I have had enough to sink a ship!!

Oh fudge! How I Love/Hate thee! My hips scream out thy name! My scale curses thy presence!

To top it off, typing this blog has been the most exercise my body has gotten this whole week off! Well, that isn't exactly true, but very close.

Enough is enough! Time to get going. Time to stop sitting and watching LMN movies and get moving. But what should I do? It is way too cold outside to do anything outdoors. Isn't it? Well maybe not. I could bundle up! I also have an elliptical downstairs...in the cold,dark, dank basement.

Okay, if I can do it, (and I will!) then you can do it!  I will lose at least a pound before the end of the year! Not just water weight either! lol, cause that would be too easy.

Well here is too a happy, healthy and adventurous new year!

New Recipe

Okay I know this might sound sickening to some of you, but I have a new recipe for Turkey Sliders! It involves Hummus and Cucumbers. They are low in fat and calories, so it is good for me to eat. And who knows, I might just like them. Which would be a plus since I have not been making smart choices lately. Not that I am eating bad for me foods, just not eating food period because I don't know what to eat that will satisfy my silly stubborn tastebuds! 

Oh and I have decided that laying off of chocolate for two weeks (oh my gosh!!!!!!) will be the best thing for me. I just need to stay away from sugar period to get my flavor savors in check and cleansed.

Will be walking tonight hopefully and maybe some elliptical. Need to start whipping up on my fat! If it don't like it, it can just leave! (please let it leave!!!)

Anyway, if the Sliders work out I will post the recipe.  Stay tuned...

STOP!

If you know me well, you know I hit every RED light there is! Lights see me coming and turn yellow then red immediately.  I don't know why, it just seems I am a magnet for them. I think maybe God has a message in this for me, but what? It seems everything I do - whether it is housework, writing my book, going on a trip, helping someone, and yes even losing weight - or try to do, I run into a giant Stop sign! 

Today, my van is on it's last breath and I just needed it to take me to work and back. I literally had to stop at every light in Union. Six of them in a three mile stretch. My van tends to stop breathing and chokes on me when I come to a stop. I have to turn off the car and restart it. ANNOYING!!! On the trip home from work, I kept asking God why He was allowing the lights to turn red on me, no answer came. However, while I continued to hit red light after red light, my van never died. Which is an amazing feat all in itself.  Yet, I still whined...and whined. When I pulled into the driveway and my van coughed, but didn't stop breathing, God let me know - I made it home! 

Indeed I did. I humbly apologized for being a whinny baby and started saying Thanks. 

I have been a BIG WHINNY BABY a lot lately!  Thankful for what I have, but very discontent. Especially with where I am in my weightloss. I see the photo down below of me three months ago and 35 pounds lost. That was, again, THREE months ago. Now I am only 40 pounds down. Thats 5 pounds in 3 months! Really?! Seriously, I have busted my butt, but my butt won't come off! Neither will my gut! Stoplight! Don't get me wrong, I am not going to stop. What I am going to do is stop stressing over it. It has to come off eventually!

I have even started jogging while I walk. Stoplight! My knees are not liking it at all and you can forget about my lower back even wanting to do anything the next day. But I will prevail! I feel better - minus the knees and lower back - and know I am doing all I can to do. Really?! Am I? 

No, I should walk more. Twice a week, really doesn't cut it. I rationalize that it is now dark when I get home and that is is freezing cold in the morning. I have an elliptical downstairs I could ride anytime, but do I --NO! Why not? - I have no answer to that. Which is an answer all in itself - laziness! Not enough motivation! Really? Seriously, 275 lbs isn't enough motivation?

Well.....GO already!

French Proverb

"Gourmets dig their graves with their teeth."

Had a great week last week. This week is going pretty good also. Have lost weight and am almost at my next mountain peek! Been walking a lot lately, but haven't had a chance to do the elliptical because my knee is acting up on me. Aggravating to be ready to do something only to have to stop for mechanical problems! This journey is hard enough, now this has added insult to injury! But I keep on plugging.

Been writing down everything I eat and all my exercise. It has helped me a great deal. Was tempted last night while shopping to buy some Keebler Grasshoppers; Dark Chocolate minty goodness! I figured "2 a day wouldn't hurt me! I have been good!" but then I remembered a line from the book I am reading called, "Made to Crave", that stated any reward that isn't beneficial to your health or healthy living isn't a reward at all, it is a stumbling block. I knew if I bought them I would eat more than just "2" a day. In fact I am pretty sure the whole box would have been gone before I got home. I was desperately craving chocolate!! So I didn't buy them. I reassured myself that, "I don't deserve what those would do to me!" I would have became a chocolate monster and ate every single one of them. Let me restate that; I would have inhaled every single one of them. I wanted to right there in the store!! It took every ounce of will-power I had, which wasn't much - Praise God, He stepped in and gave me strength - to put those cookies back on the shelf and walk away. It would have tasted good for a second or three, but this morning I wouldn't have felt good and the shame would be overwhelming. Instead, I feel pretty good and my body is still on the right path. And I truly didn't miss out on anything! I went home and had a small Andés Mint instead. It satisfied my tastebuds and didn't ruin everything I have been working towards.

A wise person stated - "We never repent of having eaten too little." - I try to keep that in mind because I was made for more than this!

Back on track!

Okay, I am rid of "Old Judi" mentality and have gotten myself back in a good frame of mind.  Went to the Fitness Center and road the elliptical for 2 minutes longer. Up to 17 minutes!! One of which was going backwards. Not to pat myself on the back, but "Yeah Me!!" Tomorrow I will go for 20 minutes...I will let you know how that goes.

I haven't weighed myself yet (been about three weeks now) but I am assuming I am at the 278 mark. I hope. I will find out tomorrow morning. Trying to stay positive!

What would be a healthy dinner for my family and I, that the fam would actually eat? Any Suggestions?

Another week down!

Haven't weighed myself in a while, too scared of what the blasted scale will say! I know, I know, I have been working hard and eating right, but sometimes the scale doesn't agree. It has been a little rough lately...not to stay on my diet, but to have hope that all I am doing is actually accomplishing anything. My clothes still fit the same. I have such a long weigh (pun intended) to go, and I know that it will take a while to get there, but I should be losing more than 1 pound a month!! Which is what it feels like.

However, I will press on!
So to help myself get in the right frame of mind, I have decided to list some good things about working out and eating healthy. They are:
 1- I can go up stairs without embarrassing myself by breathing hard  or stopping midway up cause I can't breath.
2- I walk faster and with a longer stride.
3- I am stronger
4- I can squat down and rise back up without holding on to something or falling on my face!!
5- I don't think about food all the time now
6- I don't fear sitting on things and having them collapse from my weight near as much.
7- Confidence is coming back
8- I have met some truly great people along this journey, who have either helped me by going there with me, giving me guidance, and/or encouraging me to keep going.

To anyone reading this who doesn't know me, I hope you will start your own journey and share it with me. It isn't easy, but it is soooooo worth it!

Keeping it going!

I am almost at the 40 pound mark. For the first time ever, I can truly see myself thin. I know I will succeed. I did the elliptical today and lasted 12 minutes. Not bad for someone who could last only 8 minutes a week ago. Been working out and staying consistent on my diet...there is no going back to eating junk, processed foods. They taste nasty to me now. God truly has delivered me from that kind of eating! He gets all the glory! He has sent people at just the right moments to encourage and strengthen me in this "losing" journey.
I have decided to reward myself with a full body massage every 50 pounds I lose. I used to turn to "nondiet" foods, like ice cream, brownies and such, but I have just incorporated them into my diet on occasion. But truth be told, I don't eat that but maybe once a month, and I don't miss it.
I love how my body is shaping up too. I love being able to squat down and pick things up! I love not having to have someone else do things for me cause my health or body fat won't let me! AND it is just going to get better!!!!
I see others in the gym at work (students) who need the same routine as I have and want so badly to help them, but I also know I wouldn't want someone walking up to me and saying, "I can help you lose weight!" AS IF!  lol. I have to keep reminding myself, I still need help too! I have not made it yet... I will though, watch out world, Judi is almost back!